Forgive me

Forgive me for I may have sinned. Or I may have simply been speaking on behalf of the whole of the rest of the world. Here is the conversation that just happened to the best of my memory:

Me: Hello, Steve Tilley speaking

Caller: Could I speak to Mr Tilley please?

Me: Yes, Steve Tilley speaking.

Caller: My name is calling from Lloyds Bank. I'm ringing in connection with a letter we sent you about Payment Protection Insurance in December 2013. Before we go any further can I ask you a couple of security questions? What is your date of birth?

Me: I'm not going to answer security questions to a complete stranger over the phone.

Caller: If you ring 0800 1510292 it will confirm who I am.

Me: Look. I did make a PPI claim which was handled and settled by an agent. If you want to talk about it that is fine.

Caller. I'm sorry Mr Tilley I cannot proceed with this call unless you answer security questions. You need to phone that number first.

Me: I don't have time to waste doing that. You have my address so you can write to me. You have my mobile so you can text me.

Caller: I'm sorry I'm not allowed to do that.

Call ends.

For the record, I have been a customer of Lloyds Bank for 42 years.